Story of Grace

We were challenged by the pastor to share our stories of Grace.

As much as I know I am vocal of my daily struggles and thoughts and epiphanies,  I realized I might not have ever shared my story in one sitting.

I was raised in quasi Christian home.  I knew a lot about church and the Bible because I used to be good at memorizing things.  I didn't know why I knew all this or why it was important but it made my parents happy so I did it.

My family went through some trails when I was 7 and my attitude became more about living life in the moment, enjoying  the people around me and making happy memories in any circumstances.  I became obsessed with pictures because it was the only way I could "hold on to moments forever."

I fell in love with falling in love.  The idea intrigued me. So I fell in love but not all childhood love stories end up the way you see it in movies.  Not to sound like a cynic but that is my experience. 

To this day other than my battle of pride, I see myself in a  constant battle with Jesus about the whole idea of love and being in love and what love means in Earthly terms.  The more I try to understand it, the more I get lost in it. I can't grasp God's version of love and He wont give me what I want!

As this year draws to a close, I have spent another year trying to  convince God of what I need and in turn I have not received what I want.  2013 flew by and for all the days that has passed I can say I see God's grace in bringing me through because I refused to walk quietly.  I stomped, I had to be dragged and occasionally carried through 2013. No regrets is how I always wanted to live but this year i have some regrets.

So thankful that His mercies are new every morning.

Love God and (somehow) the rest will follow...